I have brown things in my hair: Ken’s unofficial Lord of the Rings musical review
Hey, did someone open a door back there? I swear there’s a draft coming from the stage. In fact, I think it’s getting stronger. Wait a second, they planned this — it’s supposed to be windy. Ouch, what hit me? Hey, there’s stuff blowing around all over the place! Wow, cool, that’s a big red nasty Balrog. Fly, you fools, fly! Get him, Gandalf, get him… doh! (Curtain drops, Ken and Karen pick brown tissue paper out of their hair, go and buy chocolate-covered almonds)
1st intermission
Ken: “I think Bilbo was the best character.”
Karen: “He had two lines.”
Ken: “Yeah, well, do you remember anyone else?”
Karen: “I thought the hobbits were really good.”
Ken: “Which one?”
Karen: “Hmmph. The end scene was really neat, and I thought the Nazgul were really well done.”
Ken: “Yeah, I couldn’t figure out what they were blowing at us. How’d they get those horse guys to stand up?”
After the show
Karen: “The spider was really amazing.”
Ken : “You’re right, it was big.”
I’m not certain what I expected when we bought our tickets for the Lord of the Rings musical. Perhaps my musical theatre experience is dominated by the likes of Beauty and the Beast, the Sound of Music, and Little Orphan Annie? Perhaps I’ve seen the films too many times? In any case, I can hum the score from Peter Jackson’s Fellowship of the Ring, but I can’t remember any of the songs from the musical last night. 3 steps outside the theatre, I couldn’t remember any of the songs, save that Galadriel’s number was the only one with melody, and my favourite character remained the man with few appearances, Bilbo Baggins. All the remaining songs collapse into a pounding, prehistoric, pagan fire dance, and the remaining characters into dark leaping forms on a revolving disk, occasionaly lit by pulsating red lights.
Now, I’m a Lord of the Rings fan, but I’m not hard-core. I own the novels, but not the recent films. In reality, J.R.R Tolkien’s trilogy has simply held my interest amd admiration because of it’s brilliance in subtlety — characters you think could actually exist, plot twists that beg deep philosophical questions (the tree people tore down the factory?), and a statement about the nature of power that rings (pun intended?) with profound implications.
Unfortunately for me, the musical didn’t contain any of this. The major story events were there, but the production lurched fron one scene to the next, seemingly trying to fit them all in, but, in the process, abbreviating events to the point of confusion and losing any emotional momentum. The Forbes review of opening night tonight claims theatre-goers must either know the story before seeing the musical, or else risk mass confusion as the musical quickly introduces and leaves characters (Eowyn, who?), shifts from one land to the next (was that battle at gondor or mordor?), and starts bits of plot that never seem to be resolved (he went into the paths of the dead, but did those guys actually fight?). Perhaps the story is just too much for one evening. Heck, Peter Jackson took almost 12 hours and still removed my favourite part (re-taking of the Shire — which, interestingly, is part of the musical).
The redeeming factor, the factor which I’m certain is responsible for the $27 million price tag, and the factor which will need to earn return on that investment, is technical execution. The effects are spectacular. Orcs running around on spring-shoes of some sort, Nazgul floating on and off stage (how did they stand up?), Ents on the tallest stilts I’ve ever seen (wait a minute, how did they stand up?), a wind machine which created a veritable storm in the theatre (complete with flying debris), a huge back-lit Balrog, and a surprisingly creepy representation of Shelob, the spider-creature, all of this accompanied by pounding drums, crescendos, and people running in all directions. Boom!
I’m sure time will tell whether or not Toronto ought to be proud of this world premiere, but, hey, it’s still a big one, isn’t it? There are few stories popular than Lord of the Rings (Harry Potter, eat dirt), and perhaps this musical will draw an unconventional crowd. The theatre-goers I encountered (day before official opening night) were a mixture of families with children, teenagers on cell phones, folks in faded blue jeans, and, of course, people like us who figure theatre outings require evening gowns and neckties. The theatre producers have been suggesting the unexpected, that they’ve “attempted not to pull the novel towards the standard conventions of musical theatre, but rather to expand those conventions so that they will accommodate Tolkien’s material” (CBC news). Hmm… Perhaps I needed to simply embrace my inner caveman.
–Ken
